Here we go.

Its the last day of 2009, OMG.

I can't really think of my new years resolutions (cos I keep on forgetting) but I'm just gonna type down a few that I can think of.

1. I shall study more.

Freaking serious with this one. OMG imagine if I can't meet up to the points. OMG I'm gonna die. Like seriously. :P Yes. I'm gonna study more. (Keep reminding myself.)

2. I shall NOT tolerate anyone (and I mean ANYONE) who criticises my body.

This one I'm also very serious. *deep breath* I HATE and WILL NOT TOLERATE it when people, with their lack of manners, comment on my body. EXAMPLE. The pilaks back in Sabah who call out and shout at girls who walk by. Even this evening I was downstairs walking with a friend and a bunch of guys I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW yelled at us. I shall not type out what they said. Use your own imagination. I'm sure pretty much every girl has been through this.

I mean, WTF. I was wearing a damn t-shirt and shorts. Not a miniskirt, not a dress, not a bikini. FOR GODS SAKE. What is so revealing about a t-shirt and shorts? They weren't even very short shorts. What gives those fckrs the right to be so rude? I was SO pissed off and most of all I was VERY VERY PARANOID.

It takes me back to the times in Sabah. With the pilaks. The fear and the paranoia rushes back to me. I AM FREAKING TERRIFIED OKAY.

It's just so not nice.

I couldn't even tell you how many times these things happen to me. Example a while ago when some people (Qiqi I'm sure you know what I'm talking about) commented AGAIN on the way I look.

WHAT IS IT WITH YOU PEOPLE? So bored with your pathetic lives that you have to validate yourself by criticising and making rude comments about someone you don't even know? LAME.

(yeah. A bunch of fugly Chinese guys I don't even bother to know their names because THEY ARE SO INSIGNIFICANT.)

So I have curves. Its not something I'm ashamed of. I don't look like a supermodel. I'm not super skinny and perfect. Again, NOT something I'm ashamed of. Yeah I love myself, I respect myself enough to NOT be bothered by what you people say about me.

I used to be like "Oh nevermind la, guys are like that, just ignore them."

BUT NOT ANYMORE.

I swear I shall kick a guy very very VERY hard straight in the balls if he makes me feel in any way uncomfortable about myself. (And then he shall be a girl, and then he shall know how I feel.) TEEHEE. (:

I SWEAR I WILL.

3. I shall call home more often.

I usually just wait for my mum to call me. But I think I shall call her more from now on. (: hee.

And my dad. I love them both so much, I'll always be a mummy-and-daddy's girl, I don't care, I just miss being manja with them HEHE. :D

4. I shall continue with this pretty pinky blog.

Thank you to everyone who spends time reading what I post here. (: Means alot. I mean mostly I write this for myself, to record down things I'm unable to speak out about, but it's nice, it's sweet when I know there are people interested enough in me to take time and read what I write. (:

And plus this blog keeps me from going psycho.

0_O

5. I shall be less emo.

I emo alot these days. At home, in class, even in a pet shop with Felicia once. :D hahaha. But its not healthy. Plus it scares the hell outta my roommate. So. I shall emo less. (:

I shall also.......

Pay more attention in church.

Read my Bible more often.

EXERCISE MORE AND LOOK HOTTER. :DDDD

Try not to get too pissed off at people who piss me off.

SMILE more. (:

LAUGH more. (:

CRY LESS.

Take more chances.

Try new things.

AND SO MUCH MORE!

There's so much I wanna do! :)

xoxo karen

How to write this without sounding too.... gross? :P

You want a (nice) post about you right? Well you're gonna get it. (:

So... I haven't known you long. And yet for reasons unknown, I can get along with you. More than that, I actually like knowing you.

Yeah we haven't officially met. Yeah you bug me about that ALL THE TIME. And yet. I think most of the time you make me happy more than sad/angry/confused.

Maybe its just really really nice to be able to talk to you. I like that I can tell you things, (even though you still think I keep too many secrets. :D) and you tell me things (I still think you, too, keep too many things from me. :X) but still. Having someone to talk to is nice.

Sometimes, sometimes, I still wonder how all this happened so fast. (because really, it was so sudden). I still wonder when you will suddenly tell me it was all a (cruel) joke. I think about this sometimes, and I always hope that its not won't happen. I always hope, that this is REAL, that we're really friends, that this is sincere. (:

I always hope that you really do like me as a person. (:

I mean you know me. You call me fragile. And I admit, although I hate to, that I AM.

And I remember asking you, not to hurt me. (:

I'm starting to trust you. And that could be a mistake. But I don't want it to be..

When I like someone, I can't seem to listen to anyone else. I can't hear the many many voices telling me to STOP or I'm gonna get hurt, STOP cos its just not right.. I can't listen to the well-meaning advice from my friends. Because I'm too stubborn for my own good.

And I pray that this WILL NOT BE a mistake. (:

xoxo karen

P/S I hope this was nice enough for you. :D

What should I blog about?

OH. Merry-belated-Christmas. :DD

I should have blogged on Christmas day but I guess I was too busy having fun. :D Kidding.

THANK YOU to all the people who gave me stuff. :D Like seriously, so sweet. :) And Felicia OMG I can't believe she really got me a freaking badminton racket. :D So awesome. Not pink, but awesome nonetheless.. Thank you. (:

Yeah so Christmas is kinda over. The lovely carols and gorgeous decorations and everything. And although I would have celebrated it differently in Sabah, I'm so grateful to my lovely roommate for taking me in so I won't die of boredom and loneliness in the jungle :P

Speaking of which, I'm heading back there in a few hours. 9pm maybe? ARGH.

I can't believe it'll be 2010 in just DAYS.

And for the first time since forever, I won't be in KK.

I'll be thinking long and hard about my new year resolutions these few days. And I'm gonna post it up soon! (: heh.

xoxo karen

YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO ME LAST NIGHT?!?!

(or rather, this morning. EARLY this morning. )

So last night, Felicia, her brother and I went out for a midnight movie. And that would have been FINE. Except.....

The minute we drove out, Jeremy (thats Felicia's brother, btw) was like pointing at the gas thingy (I dunno what you call it) and we saw it was like warning already. (which obviously means the gas was gonna habis any minute now :P) And we were like, "AHH nvm lah.." and drove on to the Curve anyways.

OK. We managed to get there without the engine dying (Major achievement, LOL) and then we went to park the car, Felicia and I. No major damage, as in didn't langgar anything, didn't langgar anyone's car, TG. (although she DID almost langgar the thing where you STOP to get parking ticket. You know, the thing that moves up and down that wan. I dunno la what you call it. :P)

OK. We went in for our movie. Spent a couple of hours there, blah blah blah. Watched Storm Warrior (OMG DO NOT WATCH THIS, I SLEPT THRU MOST OF THE DAMN MOVIE) and then we were like, "OK, that was bad..." and went to the...... wait, where's the car?? o_O

LIKE OMG WE FORGOT WHERE WE PARKED THE EFFING CAR!!!!!

OMG.

OMG.

OMG.

30 minutes later........................ (Felicia insist its 15 but I swear on my dead turtle's grave, THIRTY FREAKING MINUTES OF PANIC LATER,)

We found it. OH relief, we found the blessed car. (:

And I thought we would get to go home and forget the whole effing nightmare.

Oh, no.

THE CAR COULDN'T START.

Yes, you read right. Battery died. You know why? WE FORGOT TO SWITCH OFF THE LIGHTS. Yeap. Bimbotic or what? (Felicia, I mean. We all know I'm already a bimbo, right?) XD

And we were like OMG, what are we gonna do now, the engine won't start. And Jeremy, being the TOTAL GENTLEMAN he is, abandoned us to search for help.

So here we are. Sitting in an empty parking lot, just two girls, engine won't start, and I see two guys approaching us.

I was like, "OMG Felicia, close the door eh!" cos the two guys looked like rapists-slash-psychopaths-slash-freaks. :P

And then before we could do anything they came right up to our car!

And............................................ Offered to help us jumpstart the car. (:

I was like about to faint with relief, LOL! TGTGTG.

Christmas spirit! Total strangers stopping to help us. (Although really they DID look freaky. :P)

We got home safely. (: (after Felicia sesat a couple of times and gaduh with her brother la, but still. :D)

Dramatic much? ;D

Remind me, to never ever NEVER watch midnight movie with these two again. :D

xoxo karen

Okay, so, I kinda got this off some random site I don't really remember, I modified it abit, and filled it in. :) Just for fun.

The end of 2009 is near, its here!

(x) stayed single for the whole year (SAD, I know. :D)

( ) kissed in the snow

( ) celebrated Halloween

( ) Kissed in the rain

(x) Had your heart broken ( :( )

(x) Broke someone else's heart (still feel guilty about this)

(x) Had a stalker ( HAHAHA OMG)

( ) Had a good relationship with someone

( ) Had a relationship with someone you'll never forget

(x) Did something you regretted ( don't we all?)

(x) Lost faith in love (SAMSON! Remember my "I hate boys" phase? XD XD)

( ) Kissed under a mistletoe

OTHER STUFF..

(x) Painted a picture ( It wasn't that awesome, but still. (: )

( ) wrote a poem

( ) Wrote a song

(x) ran a mile ( It probably was NOT actually a mile :D)

( ) Shopped at Hollister or Abercrombie and Fitch

(x) wrote a blog ( KAREN'S PRETTY PINKY BLOG <3)

(x) Listened to music you couldn't stand ( GEE GEE GEE GEE BABY3)

( ) Went to a sleepover

( ) Went camping

(x) Threw a surprise party

(x) Laugh til you cried ( usually with Sarah. KAN? :D)

( ) cut in a line of waiting people

(x) visited a foreign country ( Vietnam, I'll always remember :) )

( ) Partied to celebrate the new year

(x) Cooked a disastrous meal ( OMG I can just see Felicia smirking at this)

( ) Lost someone important to you

In 2009, I......

(x) Broke a promise (*guilty*)

(x) Lied (*guilty* again)

( ) Went behind my parents' back

(x) Cried over a broken heart ( we all do sometimes..)

( ) Disappointed someone else

(x) Hid a secret ( HAHA I can imagine someone laughing at this one :P)

(x) Pretended to be happy ( sometimes lah.)

( ) Slept under the stars

(x) Missed home (biru2 puncak Kinabalu, tengok dari jauh, hati saya rindu :) <3)

( ) Kept my new year's resolution

(x) FORGOT my new year's resolution ( I think I didn't make one. :D)

( ) Met one of my idols

(x) Met someone who changed my life (SAMSON YAP WU YONG. *muaksss!* ILU. <3>

(x) Sat at home all day doing nothing (every Sunday oh, kan Sarah? :D)

( ) Lost something expensive

( ) Given up something important to me

(x) Learnt something new about myself ( I learn something new everyday :D)

(x) Try something I normally wouldn't try, and liked it (EXERCISE. OMG. )

(x) Made a change in my life. ( Hell yeah. Im in KTT, TOTAL CHANGE OF LIFESTYLE, LOL)

(x) Found out who my true friends were ( The lovely people who are there for me, who keep in touch, who are totally honest with me. Loves. (: )

( ) Stayed up til sunrise

(x) Cried over the silliest thing ( ALL THE TIME. :P)

( ) Got into a car accident

(x) Met great people ( yeah, my lovely classmates and new friends. :) )

(x) Had friends drifting away from me (sad, but yeah it happens)

( ) Had someone close to me die

( ) Had a high cell phone bill

( ) Spent most of my money on food

( ) Had a fist fight

( ) Went to the beach with my best friend

( ) Saw a celebrity

(x) Gotten sick (on the bright side I got to skip Chem. Oh my hatred for Chem. :P)

It has been a fulfilling, crazy, exhilarating, exhausting and yet amazing year. And as 2009 is ending in around 8/9 days like that, I'm looking back and smiling at the great memories and tearing at the not-so-awesome ones. And yet despite it all I'm looking forward (surprisingly) to the new year.

Watch out 2010 here I come. ;D

xoxo karen

Guess what I saw in Melaka yesterday??

OHMIGOSSSSSSHHH ITS THE MOST ADORABLE THING EVER!! *bimbo voice* :D

wanna see, wanna see?

Oh goodness, I WANT IT SO BAD. A pink piano! (: I love. *sigh*

I always joke to Sarah (or maybe its not a joke to me) that one day when I have a house of my own EVERY SINGLE THING WILL BE PINK. (:

I get more obsessed with the colour every day. :P (i wish there was more pink food :D HAHA)

And yeah, I'm well aware I've already posted this on Facebook but since I kinda like the picture I'm gonna post it again. :)

It was such a fun trip. A bit crazy maybe, abit childish maybe, but going out with these lovely girlfriends of mine, is a sure way to just forget all my problems and have fun. (:

I was gonna post more pics but I got too lazy. Heh.

xoxo karen

OMG.

Yeah its a moment where I feel so..................... STUPID.

Why did I, even for a moment, let myself believe that......... never mind.

I suddenly realise..

Seriously I feel so dumb. And I have a sudden urge to cry.

And also, a sudden burst of anger.

ARGH I hate you. My first perception of you WAS right, although really, if I'm completely honest with myself, I didn't want it to be. I DIDN'T WANT TO BE RIGHT FOR ONCE.

I can't even put it down in words.

What, am I supposed to forget this whole thing ever happened?..

xoxo karen

We played badminton this evening, me and Felicia.

And she said something that I didn't realise, but now I hear it I know its true.

She said, I haven't seen you really happy in a long time.

TRUE. I.... haven't really been very happy lately I guess.. I laugh but I never really feel HAPPY.. I don't know why..

Maybe its a case of me missing home. :P

Scared.Paranoid.Afraid.ToomanypeopletellingmewhatIshoulddo.

xoxo karen

According to him,

I'm BEAUTIFUL, INCREDIBLE,

he can't get me outta his head....

According to him,

I'm FUNNY, IRRESISTABLE,

everything he ever wanted. (: <3

THIS IS A SONG. :P Not what I wrote myself, lol. Its very very catchy! I've been listening to it repetitively for days now and I'm still not bored yet. (:

Orianthi, According to you. <3

xoxo karen

P/S I don't normally put down lyrics on my blog, its only because this song is so lovely and I like it alot, thats why its here. (:

I wanna blog!

But these days seriously I do NOT have the creativity. What should I blog about? What's interesting?

STUDYING KILLS CREATIVE BRAIN CELLS. :P (seriously)

Thats why I haven't posted anything new/funny/insulting someone/bimbotic in a long long time.

Been studying like a good girl. (yeah right, more like GUILTY cos my results are TOTAL CRAP and I need to work harder. :P)

2 WEEKS TO CHRISTMAS! (nope, not excited this year.)

Actually, I take that back. I'm kinda excited la. As horrible as it sounds, its the food and alcohol and Christmas carols that are totally exciting for me. Ahem. Sorry God. *repents*

I love carolling. (AHEM. EVEN THOUGH MY VOICE NOT THAT NICE LA, KAN. :P)

HAIIIH.

Its hard, really hard, not to get depressed at this time of the year. A whole year is about to pass, and I feel as though I haven't really achieved anything I'm really proud of. OH GOODNESS THIS BLOG IS PINK AND SUPPOSED TO BE CHEERFUL, SORRY EVERYONE, I'M BEING SUCH A BORE. D:

Haven't called home for DAYS already, to the extent my mum called just now demanding to know WHY I haven't called home. :P

HAHA RANDOM RANDOM FACTS.

xoxo karen

Haven't updated in forever.

Did ya miss me? ;D

HEHE. Okay well. I wanted to blog yesterday but ahem, got distracted. :P

yeah. Its been a long week. Hmm. I got the most awesome phone call last weekend. (NO NOT FROM TAYLOR LAUTNER LOLLOLLOL) it was from my old friends. Tatianna Kimberley Chai. Morgan Nick Muffin Jelami. :D Everybody's in KK, everybody's enjoying themselves. :)

Ahem. Not that I'm bitter or anything. I do miss them though. The question they all ask, "when are you coming back?" makes me wish I was already there.

But Nick's right. Its like I never left. :)

My classmates, I miss them alot. Everyone's different now, its true, but no matter what I look back on the memories wit a smile. Totally crazy bunch of kids (yes, kids) trying to grow up and fly. (:

I wonder what we'll all be like 20 years from now.

I love my Sabahan friends. SO different from my West Malaysian friends here.

The drama and the insults, the hurtful words. Its really wearing me out. I kinda just wanna end this whole stupid fight, but when I think back it does make me so angry I can't let it go just yet.

xoxo karen

Yeah, so, I'm spending Christmas this year with my roommate.

Its like my first X'mas away from Sabah.. And understandably I'm feeling slightly homesick.. (yeah so whats new..) And while I'm loving the idea of spending X'mas with Felicia (she's like SUCH a close friend to me now) I think I have every right to be a Grinch this year. (:

So I come up with this list, of 15 things I want for X'mas that are freaking impossible for me to get (But I'm still hoping, of course. ;D)

15 THINGS I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS.

(and why I won't get them)

15. To see my dogs and turtles. (I CAN'T GO BACK KK)

14. To go home to Kota Kinabalu (RM 650 MAN!!!! OMGOMGOMG I'M SO NOT ABLE TO AFFORD IT) :(

13. To get 4A's in my AS June 2010 (IT FEELS SO IMPOSSIBLE RIGHT NOW)

12. To get a cute green pet snake. :) (RM 500-plus plus. :P)

11. A pretty new Acer laptop! (: (I bet they don't make pretty PINK, affordable laptops. :P)

10. A BOYFRIEND!!! (except nobody wants me. :'() HAHA. Yeah.

9. A bigger apartment. (impossible unless I lose weight. :D)

8. To lose 10 kg. (HAHAHAHAHA DREAM ON :P)

7. A new pink phone! :) (again, no money :P)

6. A HUG FROM TAYLOR LAUTNER!!!!!! (oh, effing Taylor Swift. :'()

5. A Christmas tree! (The closest I come to one is the tree growing on my balcony LOL)

4. A perm. :D (but my hair already rebonded D:) ehem. AND, unlike some people, I actually look decent with rebonded hair. :D HAHAHA IN YOUR FACE.

3. Taylor Swift destroyed! :D (BWAHAHA! No lar. Taylor Lautner will protect her wan. (: HAHA)

2. PATRICK COME BACK TO KTT! (in 3 months. By then X'mas is over ady lur.. ) :P

1. A pretty, super light and PINK badminton racket. :)

I have no Christmas spirit this year, I swear. :O

xoxo karen

I'm gonna be a GRINCH this Christmas.

Seriously.

I don't even get to go back to Sabah. :(

OHHHHH.

Its another one of those days where I'm emo.

I've given it lots of thought. And I think its true la. I accept it. Even though its difficult. I've been through it before, I know. Before a new relationship forms, a friendship with someone else has to disappear to make way for that new commitment. Get it? I don't know if I'm explaining it correctly. :P

Lets simplify it abit. A likes B. B is evil and doesn't know how to appreciate what "IT" has. A and C are friends. But because of B's selfishness, A and C will never really be as close as they might have been. Or once were. Same difference.

Better now?

I'm not going to explain this post to anyone. All I know is I dislike somebody MORE and MORE every single pathetic day.

You make me sick. YOU DISGUST ME.

xoxo karen

My much awaited Vietnam pictures! :) I have a lot but I'm only uploading a few today.. The rest another time la.. XD Its taking too long and my patience is really disappearing. :P

My brother and I outside an opera theater.

This is me screaming in fear as the snake tried to strangle me. D: (but I STILL wanna have a pet snake) :)

THIS ugly little bugger is a water puppet. :D haha.

Makes you drool, doesn't it? ;D

I don't remember, I think this is beef. (: it was yummy. :D

This was a mixture of fish and veggies and noodle wrapped in rice paper. (:

Vietnamese curry. :D DAMN DELICIOUS! :)

Chicken? I think? I forgot. :P

The huge hotel room in Vietnam. Seriously its only 3 star but in my humble opinion, better than alot of Malaysian 5 star hotels. :) And they gave free fruit! :D (as you can see me acting retarded)

I wanted to post a family pic but its really taking forever. Another time maybe. :P

xoxo karen